“The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.”

Alan W. Watts

The new year is a time when I find myself looking back at what was, trying to imagine the path ahead.  But one thing I know, everything changes.  Each year, each day, each moment, brings something different.   Nothing stays the same forever, and I can’t cling or hold onto what was. 

Everything changes

Nature is an example of constant change. Night becomes day, and the seasons change. In the Northeast United States, we experience the variety of each season. The heat of summer, and the smell of freshly mowed grass, the crispness of fall and fall foliage, winter snow, and the blossoming in the spring. We all get older. Your body changes as new cells replace old ones. As a result, you may look different than you did 5 or 10 years ago.  

The practice of meditation can be a practice of noticing change. For example, as you watch your breath, you see your inhale become an exhale, you notice the ebb and flow, the shifts and changes with each breath. Thoughts come and go, sensations in your body come and go.

No matter how much you wish things to stay the same, they won’t. They can’t.  

Nothing is controllable

Because change is uncomfortable, you may try to control your environment. You may try to control other people or the situations around you. No matter how hard you fight to keep change from happening, in reality, you can’t control much.

The Buddha realized that dissatisfaction in your life is caused by clinging to comfort, clinging to the known. This clinging causes anxiousness as you try to hang on to your experiences. This clinging and aversion to the unknown can keep you stuck.

Imagine driving in the same rut over and over. The more you drive in the rut, the deeper the grooves. You may no longer need to worry about steering, but going up and over the deep ruts may be difficult or even impossible. It will be hard to change direction.  

Navigating change

Change will happen. Some changes may not be easy to accept. But as the Buddha taught, clinging to something that has changed creates its anxiety or dissatisfaction.

Be aware that some traumatic changes may require professional assistance, like grief counseling. However, there are tools to navigate change like new opportunities, moving, or finding where they moved your favorite can of soup in the grocery store.

There are many practices to help you navigate change by learning there is a part of you that does not change. Each of us has an internal witness that watches and observes change without being affected.

Meditation

During the practice of meditation, you may watch your breath. You feel the sensation of each inhale and exhale, and you may hear the sound of your breath. Your chest expands and relaxes, rises, and falls as you breathe. Your inhale becomes an exhale. The witness does not change. It just observes. I like to compare this idea of the witness to be in the eye of a hurricane. The hurricane still swirls around the eye, but inside is still. You can witness the storm without getting caught up in the winds.

Through practices like meditation and yoga, your inner compass and your intuition get louder. As you find the quiet space in the center of the storm, you can hear the voice of your intuition, your inner knowing. Your inner wisdom understands the changing nature of things. Your inner compass can help you navigate change by understanding what is truly important to you.

Yoga

Yoga adds physical movement to the practice to observe the sensation of movement from the witness’s view. The body moves, and you feel the sense of movement, but the “you” that is the witness observes without change. Yoga practices can teach you first physically to ground your mat and balance. These practices help keep you connected to the moment. These practices keep you from losing yourself as things change. Trees need to be deeply rooted yet able to sway in the wind to survive a storm.

Compassion

Patience and Compassion are tools to help you navigate change. Have patience with yourself and others. We are all navigating change. Change can cause fear and anxiety. If you notice this in yourself or others, don’t judge, be compassionate. Bring love and understanding to the fear or frustration. You may choose to use the phrases of Metta or loving-kindness during a meditation. “May They/I be healthy,” May They/I be safe,” May I/They at ease,” May They/I be happy.” Create a sense of love and joy as you repeat the phrases.

Why change is good

As much as we all dislike change, imagine if nothing ever changed. Everything would be stagnant. You would be driving in a big, deep rut.  

You wouldn’t be able to see over the grooves of the rut. There would be no way out.  

Change can be welcome, like the fresh air that comes into the house when you first open the windows after a long winter. Change can be subtle or ripping something apart from the foundations and rebuilding bigger, better, and stronger.

Change may mean growth. Nature goes through cycles of growth and expansion. Change can expand your perspective. You may learn new things or view things differently.  

 Change may be what you need to force you out of the comfort of your rut.

Change is a dance

Navigating change is a dance. It is staying grounded but swaying with the beat. It is learning to let go into the music and enjoy the flow.

Yoga and meditation have taught me to try and stay in the moment, be with what is, to be resilient enough to dance with the ebb and flow of change. It’s not easy, and I don’t always succeed. Sometimes it’s hard to step out of my comfortable rut. But I try to treasure the memories. I look for the lessons, the keepsakes that I can carry forward as I step out in faith.  

Wherever your path takes you, I hope you keep dancing.  

Meditation – Releasing stuck thoughts

Change can be difficult, especially if there are thoughts stuck in your mind.  We all have the top 10 non-productive thoughts that may keep us stuck in a rut.  There are the worry thoughts, the not good enough thoughts, or just the stories we rehash about past events.

Thoughts can be difficult when you sit and meditate, yet meditating is one of the best tools to learn to work skillfully with thoughts.

I’ll lead you through a couple of different ways to work with thoughts both during meditation and eventually at any time.

Working with thoughts